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INTERPLOSION: The War of Light (4U)



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Joined: Sun Oct 30, 2011 11:26 am

Post Sat Jul 06, 2013 10:08 pm

INTERPLOSION: The War of Light (4U)


One: Beginnings

The Interplosion Mansion had experienced its longest period of peace, until the sky fell.

Nobody could have seen it coming. It was a bolt from the blue, a mysterious meteoric object flung from the farthest reaches of space. One night, as the mansion was gathered around the chatroom, the meteor plunged directly through the mansion’s upper floors and landed in the center of the chatroom. Nobody was harmed, miraculously – except for the dying alien they found underneath the meteor.

They pushed the meteor aside and began to nurse the alien back to health. This action doomed them all. Within a week, everybody in that room would be dead.
This is their story.

Interplosion Mansion, [LOCATION REDACTED], 8:42 PM

“FUCK,” Rando yelled as the deafening noise that had been building slowly over the last few seconds suddenly erupted into a crashing sound just above their heads. He hadn’t even managed to get the word out of his mouth when a large object – nobody could really tell what it was at the time, other than that there was a massive glowing green shape at the bottom of it – fell through the ceiling and landed in the center of the chatroom.

He had recoiled severely, falling backwards out of the chair he had been seated in, and tumbling over so his feet were now above his head. He took a moment to straighten himself up, dust himself off, and then surveyed the room. Darian, who had been seated next to him, was covering her ears, slightly crouched next to the wall. As Rando wondered why she was covering her ears, he became aware of the loud ringing in his own ears, and suddenly slapped his hands over his own ears. As he sat there, hoping the ringing would die down, he saw Karia pushing turned over furniture out of the way in order to free Rinsan, who had been nearly crushed by an armchair that had previously been occupied by Nick. Nick himself was standing outside the room, his hands clutching the doorframe as he cautiously poked his head in. Tod was consoling a distraught Dawn to the best of his ability, though it seemed like neither of them could hear what they were saying, the ringing still deafening their ears. Deimos had apparently been relatively unaffected, and was angrily dusting debris off his shirt. SHG had apparently been far more shaken by the impact, and had her arm against the wall for support, seemingly dizzied by the commotion. Zaphod was attempting to wrest a table out of the way so that Roast could climb out of an unfortunately phallic pile of furniture that had clustered on the side of the room opposite where the object now sat.

The ringing finally subsided, and Rando approached the fallen object. The glowing green base that he had seen as it fell had vanished, and it appeared to be simply a meteor. How it had survived entry mostly intact was a puzzle that went through Rando’s head for a few moments before Karia shouted, “There’s somebody under there!”

He looked, and indeed there was somebody under the meteor – but everybody was accounted for. There wasn’t anybody missing that he could see – so who was under the meteor? Rando turned and looked at Darian, who appeared concerned. Zaphod, seeing that nobody else was taking the initiative, moved over to the meteor and put his hands on it cautiously. Seeing that it was quite cool, he signaled to the rest of the chatroom. “Alright, come on guys. I think if we all push together we can get this meteor off whoever is crushed under there.” Nobody moved, and Rando was a bit uncertain about moving the meteor off whoever was trapped under there. It wasn’t likely to be one of them, and if they moved the meteor it could potentially harm the person under there even more. Zaphod was bothered by the lack of movement, and shouted “COME THE FUCK ON GUYS, THEY’RE DYING UNDER THERE.” This sprung people into action. Within seconds, the entire chat was pushing the meteor. It took a few seconds and quite a bit of strain, but they got the meteor off the person trapped beneath it.

What they saw underneath was something none of them were prepared for.

Beneath the meteor was a humanoid figure, roughly the size of an average man, with deep red skin and an improbably round head. He had no body hair to speak of, and his skin appeared to be vaguely reptilian, with a strangely iridescent quality to it. But most of his skin was obscured by a vibrant green uniform with a strange symbol on his chest. On his right hand, he wore a bright, glowing green ring on his middle finger. He was still breathing, but only barely, in drawn out, labored breaths.

“Jesus,” Dawn said, pulling her hand to her mouth.

“No,” Roast said, “that’s almost certainly not Jesus.”

“What the hell is he?” Nick asked from the doorway.

“I don’t know,” Rando responded. “I’m pretty sure it’s not human.”

“You don’t say,” Tod quipped, his arm wrapped around Dawn.

They all looked at the creature for a few moments before somebody finally spoke up.

“Are we just going to sit here admiring his wounds, which are bleeding profusely, or are we going to try to help?” SHG asked.

“It’s not that simple. What is he, and why is he here? He’s clearly alien. For all we know he could be the vanguard for some assault on the mansion,” Tod reasoned.

“That’s no excuse. This is an animal of some kind, even an alien one, and he’s in pain and probably dying. We need to help him if we can.”

Tod grunted and looked to Rando. Rando nodded curtly, and Tod got the message loud and clear. “Fine. Bring him into the medical station, and I’ll do what I can.” He took his arm from around Dawn and strode out the room.

“I, uh, I’m gonna go with him,” Roast stuttered, and quickly turned to follow Tod.

Zaphod and Karia picked the creature up and carried him down the hall into the medical station. Tod had already prepared the center table, a long surgical one with instruments hanging from the side. “His anatomy is likely entirely different from human anatomy, and his blood might even be toxic. But apparently we have to try to save him anyway, with no knowledge to speak of regarding whatever species he might be.” There was a significant amount of contempt dripping from every word he said.

He grabbed a swab and began to examine the wounds of the creature, poking around and seeing if there were any bits of the meteor lodged in there. Though the upper chest cavity wound appeared to be clean (if gaping), the wound in his lower right thigh was far more severe, with several bits of meteor lodged in there. “Roast, since you’re going to hang around here for whatever reason, hand me those pliers on the table over there.

“They’re just called pliers? Isn’t there a medical term or something?”

“Yes, there is, but you wouldn’t have recognized them by that term.”

“True,” he said as he watched Tod reach into the wound. He gripped the pliers around one of the shards, and was about to pull when Roast suddenly winced audibly.


“How are you not terrified?” Roast asked.

“There’s no sense in being scared of anything. You have to control your fear, or it controls you. It’s what is separating us from the animals. The subjugators from the subjugated.”

Roast nodded, swallowed hard, and closed his eyes for a moment. He opened them again, met Tod’s piercing gaze, and gave a smaller nod. Tod pulled on the shard.

Back in the chatroom, Karia and Zaphod had returned to assist with the clean up. Nobody was quite sure what to do with the meteor, so they more or less ignored it as they picked up the rest of the furniture. There was a tension in the air. Deimos and Rinsan appeared to be mumbling angrily to themselves, though nobody could quite hear what they were saying. Nobody else dared to speak up, unsure of what to say, until finally the silence bothered Darian too much.

“You know, this is the first big thing to have happened since…” Her gaze drifted to the window, and across the long Interplosion Mansion yard, to the treeline, where there were two small gravestones, unmarked. She shuddered. “I really hope it doesn’t end with death again.”

Rando shook his head. “It won’t.”

“How do you know?”

“I don’t. But I hope it won’t, and that’s enough for me.”

Darian nodded, and returned to moving furniture. Karia asked Dawn to pass her the books that were at her feet so she could put them back in the shelves, and Dawn, after breaking out of a short reverie, handed them to her.

“You okay?”

Dawn hesitated for a moment. “Yeah… I was just… it’s nothing.”

“It’s okay, you can talk to me.” Karia smiled.

“Well… it’s just when the meteor fell through, I sort of had like a brief vision of some sort. Tod had been… he was…” From the look on Dawn’s face, Karia could tell what she meant. Karia nodded quickly, and Dawn breathed a sigh of relief. “I don’t know what I would do.”

“Well I doubt it was anything significant. It was probably just a sudden reaction that made your mind jump to a dark place. I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

Just then, Tod and Roast wheeled the creature back into the chatroom, with bandages covering the creature’s wounds. “I extracted most of the debris from his wounds, but there isn’t much I could do to stop the bleeding. He doesn’t have much longer at this rate.”

At that moment, the creature sat up slowly. “No,” it spoke, weakly. “Not long at all.” The room was dead silent. It spoke with a vaguely masculine voice. “My time has come… but you all need to be wary. My name is Abin Sur… I have seen the prophecy’s signs come true… war is coming… tell the Guardians… tell…”

He collapsed back onto the table. An electronic voice spoke from his right hand: “Lantern Abin Sur deceased. Scanning sector for replacement being.” The ring on his middle finger began to glow brightly, and it rose up, off his finger, into the air. As it flew off his body, the green uniform he was wearing faded, revealing a plain black jumpsuit. “Suitable replacement sentient found.” The ring zoomed close to Zaphod, right in front of his face. “Zaphod Beeblebrox of Earth. You have the ability to overcome great fear.” The ring zoomed down Zaphod’s arm and attached itself to his right ring finger.

“Welcome to the Green Lantern Corps.” There was a blinding flash of green light. Everybody covered their eyes and backed up a step. When they looked back at Zaphod, they saw him standing there wearing a green uniform virtually identical to the one that Abin Sur had been wearing. He also, for some reason, had a domino mask.

“Holy fucking shit,” he said disbelievingly.

The ring spoke again: “You will report to Oa for training.”

“Wait, what, training?”

Suddenly Zaphod was lifted off his feet. He was disoriented, and uncertain about just what was happening, but he tried to fight the ring’s influence. “No, damn it, I don’t want to go to Oh Uh for training! FUCK, LET ME DOWN.” He managed to fight it reasonably well, pulling himself lower and lower to the ground as he swung his arms around wildly. His fight didn’t last long, however, and the ring picked up the speed at which it pulled him along, through the opening in the ceiling the meteor had left. “NOOOOO!” he shouted, and he reached his right arm back down to the chat, who were looking on, transfixed at what was happening, when a bolt of green light shot from his hand into the meteor below. A bright shaft of white light shone from the center of the meteor, and everybody turned to gaze at it, as Zaphod was pulled faster and faster through the roof of the mansion, out of Earth’s atmosphere, and into the deep reaches of space.

Everybody was still staring at the light, despite Zaphod’s receding screams. There was an odd quality to it; though it appeared white at times, it was shifting through different colors frequently, never seeming to be any single color for more than half a second. Nobody said anything for a moment.

“Why is there blue light coming from the meteor…” Rando asked, calmly.

“Mate, that light isn’t blue. It’s red,” Deimos corrected.

“It definitely looks blue to me,” Darian added.

“Yeah no I’m seeing red,” Rinsan chimed in.

“For what it’s worth, I’m seeing yellow,” Roast noted. Tod nodded in agreement.

“It looks kinda pink to me…” Dawn muttered.

“I’m seeing green. Why is nobody else seeing green? Fuck,” Karia said, flustered. They bickered for a few more moments about what color it was, but eventually Karia had enough. “Oh there’s an easy way to settle this,” she said, as she grabbed a splinter of a wooden table that had been crushed in the impact, and shoved it into the hole in the meteor.

The light burst forth from the hole, enveloping the entire room in a blinding flash. It subsided after a moment, and then the light in the meteor had apparently vanished. Everybody looked around, silently. A quiet whirring noise had begun, though none of them could identify where it was coming from. It began to grow louder, and louder, and everybody had the realization at the same time. They all glanced upward…

A series of rings, similar to the green ring that had carried Zaphod away, was flying into the Interplosion Mansion.

“Deimos of Earth. You have great rage in your heart. You belong to the Red Lantern Corps,” a red ring spoke to Deimos.

“Rinsankajugin of Earth. You have great rage in your heart. You belong to the Red Lantern Corps,” a similar ring spoke to Rinsan.

“Karia of Earth. You have the ability to overcome great fear. Welcome to the Green Lantern Corps.”

“MesserTod of Earth. You have the ability to instill great fear. Welcome to the Sinestro Corps.”

“Roastbeef of Earth. You have the ability to instill great fear. Welcome to the Sinestro Corps.”

“Randoman of Earth. You have the ability to instill great hope. Welcome to the Blue Lantern Corps.”

“Mer_De_Noms of Earth. You have the ability to instill great hope. Welcome to the Blue Lantern Corps.”

“SuperHeroGirl of Earth. You have the ability to feel great compassion. Welcome to the Indigo Tribe.”

“Dawnkitty of Earth. You have great love in your heart. Welcome to the Star Sapphires.”

The rings all spoke over each other, in a great cacophony that drowned out all of the voices. But each person could hear the ring speaking to them loud and clear. The rings placed themselves on their fingers, and in several blinding flashes of light, everybody was outfitted in a uniform of the color of the ring that had chosen them. A moment later, the rings pulled all of them through the massive hole in the ceiling, and as they screamed, they were whisked off into the deep reaches of space.

It was at this point that Nick had returned from wherever he had gone – nobody really knew, he probably had secret places all around the mansion – and saw everybody departing. “What the FUCK,” he shouted, to nobody in particular. “Why don’t I get a goddamn ring and get flown off into space?” He grumbled to himself for a moment, until a large object fell on his head. Rubbing the spot it had hit, he glanced around and saw the object: a large, orange lantern. He picked it up, examined it, and an orange ring flew out of it and hovered in front of him. “Nickjackal of Earth. You want it all.”

He grinned widely as the ring flew onto his hand.


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Post Sun Jul 07, 2013 5:11 pm

Re: INTERPLOSION: The War of Light (4U)

Oh my sweet Lantern, yes
All I can remember after I closed my eyes, was that first, it got real loud; then, it got real hot; then it got real slimy; then it got quiet; then it got.... unspeakable. And when I opened my eyes, the pool was empty, and three days had passed.


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Posts: 180

Joined: Sun Oct 30, 2011 11:26 am

Post Mon Jul 08, 2013 8:23 pm

Re: INTERPLOSION: The War of Light (4U)

Interlude One: If Not Gods…

“Hard rain’s gonna fall.”

“It’s fallen before.”

“Not like this, it hasn’t.”

“Of course it has. You’re too young to remember the real rains.”

“I’ve seen wars.”

“You’ve seen battles. Smaller parts of the Great War that is ongoing. The War we’re losing.”

“The tide will turn. Like I said: hard rain’s gonna fall.”

“It rains on us just as much as it does on them.”

“They can’t survive the rain. We can.”

“Your arrogance will be your undoing.”

“Just as your naiveté was yours.”

“Was? I –“ *coughs* “- what’s…”

“Don’t struggle to speak. The radion is taking its toll. If you stay silent, you might live long enough to hear the rest of what I have to say.”


“Good. You always did talk too much. It’s unbecoming of a god, especially when you speak with such limited understanding. All portentous grandstanding, but no substance, no plans, no ambitions. I’ve got those in spades. I’ll lead us to victory, even if I had to kill you to do so. A hard rain’s gonna fall upon us all. It just fell upon you earlier than you anticipated.


“Die fast, now, uncle. I’ve got a world to control.”

The older being died.

“Fantastic. Now the time of Agin can begin.” The being raised a hand, and a planet formed in front of him. He focused his thoughts, and the smooth surface of the planet became filled with mountains, crags, canyons, and caverns deep beneath the surface. He curled his fingers inward, and tightened his grip. The core of the planet became hollowed out, and then gradually filled with a strange black substance as he loosened his grip. He waved his hand and the planet was sent flying out of the chamber, taking its place in orbit around a star. With one final action, he clapped his hands, and a pulse emitted from the center of the Prime Galaxy, spreading outward at speeds greater than that of light. It reached the edge of the galaxy, and the being that identified himself as Agin watched as lesser beings began to crowd around the borders of the Prime Galaxy. He smirked, knowing that his plans had been adequately set into motion, and then faded.


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Post Mon Jul 15, 2013 9:59 pm

Re: INTERPLOSION: The War of Light (4U)

Two: In Brightest Day

Looking down at the mansion as he sped up into the sky, Zaphod slowly began to come to terms with the fact that this ring was not going to relent and allow him to return to Earth. The rest of the chat was growing smaller by the second, and after a minute Zaphod couldn’t even make out the hole in the roof that the meteor fell through. A few more seconds and even the mansion became impossible to discern. Up and up, through the layers of the atmosphere that Zaphod attempted to remember as a way to busy himself as the ring pulled him along its course. He eventually breached the atmosphere, crossing the barrier into space. The view was stunning. Fortunately, the Sun was on the other side of Earth, so Zaphod could see the full night sky, unobstructed by atmospheric light distortions. So many stars filled his vision that he couldn’t help but be awestruck. He imagined Rando’s pants suddenly becoming filled with a certain discharge upon seeing it, a scene cut short as he realized suddenly that his ring had stopped. He attempted to move around, but the ring held him in place.

“Uh… what’s going on?” he asked with a great degree of uncertainty and disbelief. He was talking to a ring while floating in space; you can’t really blame him.

“Accessing Green Lantern folding network.”

“What is –“ Zaphod began to ask, as he was suddenly struck by a sensation of being squeezed through a hole the size of a pencil point. It wasn’t quite agony, but it was a feeling of constant pressure at every point on his body, which then quickly subsided. He saw now that he was in a strange tunnel-like structure, composed out of a glowing green material that didn’t look metallic, but had an odd shine to it. He traveled along the circular tunnel very quickly, being pulled along by the ring. He had only just adjusted to his surroundings when the ring spoke again.

“Approaching space sector 0, planet Oa.” The sensation returned before Zaphod could even speak, and he was pulled back into something more resembling space. Resembling because, despite the background being replete with stars, he was far enough away from one that there was effectively no light reaching him other than the miniscule visible light from distant bodies. He surveyed the area and, turning around, spotted a planet, lit with a strange eerily green light that gave the otherwise blue planet an ethereal glow. This planet was a Big Deal, he could tell. The ring began to move again, and dragged him toward the planet, landing him on a spot just outside what appeared to be a metropolis of sorts.

At this point, the ring finally stopped guiding him. He was able to move again, and used this newfound agency to stretch for a bit as he glanced around and took in the area. It was a rather craggy region that didn’t appear to have been visited by many people, but the immediate area he had landed in appeared rather artificial. It was a circular area carved into the rock with mechanical precision; nothing natural would have created it, as it was completely flat on the surface. He wondered why he had been brought to this exact spot. He glanced over at the metropolis in the distance, and saw lights flashing and could faintly hear the hustle and bustle of a major city.

For being on an alien planet, Zaphod was remarkably calm. He decided to stop looking at the weird planet and start looking at himself. The ring had given him a strange uniform of sorts, so he took the time to examine it. It was green and black, with a green pattern resembling a one-piece woman’s swimsuit covering his chest and abdomen, and black patterns covering his arms and legs. In the center of his chest was a white circle, a green symbol etched into the center of it. And, of course, the green domino mask, though he couldn’t see that.

As he was occupied with looking at his new clothing, he didn’t hear the screams from the person that was falling out of the sky to the exact spot where he was, and thus didn’t bother to look up and perhaps take a single step to the side to avoid being struck. But alas, he was struck, and fell to the ground, crushed beneath the person who had fallen to the planet. He tried to speak, but his voice was muffled by whatever body part happened to have fallen onto his face. Fortunately, the person above him – which he now registered as human, or at least humanoid – stood up pretty quickly, allowing him to also stand up, and more importantly, speak.

What he was going to say left his mind nearly instantly, however, as he realized that the body part that was obstructing his speech was, in fact, the other person’s butt.

“OH GOD WHAT THE FUCK YOUR ASS WAS IN MY FACE EWWWW” he shouted as he stuck his tongue out and began scrubbing it with his hands.

“Oh shut up, Zaphod, it was covered.”

Zaphod registered the voice and had a moment of brief confusion, because he knew that voice, but it shouldn’t be where he was. He looked up (after letting go of his tongue), and saw that he was not mistaken: the voice belonged to Karia, who stood in front of him, in her own uniform and with her own ring.

“…I take back the ‘Ewww’,” Zaphod said with a smile, a smile that faded as a hand connected with the side of his face. Karia quickly withdrew her arm and folded it back over her chest in a guarded manner.

“So how long have you been here?”

“Only like five minutes longer than you have. How did you get here, by the way?”

“Same way you did. Your green blast thing blasted a hole in the rock and light was coming out of it. We smashed it open, and suddenly rings came flying through the ceiling and attached themselves to a bunch of us. I got a green one, and it pulled me here.

“There are other colors!?” Zaphod asked, confusedly.

“Yeah but I don’t remember them all. The rings all kinda talked over each other –“ Karia was cut off by two voices speaking in unison.

“There are seven different colors of light, and seven different corps. You are Green Lanterns, claimed by the green light of willpower. There are also Blue Lanterns, wielding the blue light of hope; Yellow Lanterns, brandishing the yellow light of fear; Indigo Lanterns, governed by the indigo light of compassion; Orange Lanterns, slaves to the orange light of avarice; Violet Lanterns, more commonly known as Star Sapphires, who employ the violet light of love; and Red Lanterns, consumed by the red light of rage.” Zaphod and Karia’s rings stopped speaking at the same moment.

“Nifty,” Karia noted.

“Yo ring why did you say we were claimed by the green light or whatever? Are we slaves now or something?” Zaphod asked the ring, getting a bit more comfortable speaking to it.

“No. You are now officers in the Green Lantern Corps, an intergalactic police force tasked with upholding order throughout the universe, presided over by the Guardians of the Universe of the planet Oa, where you now are.”

“AW FUCK YEAH WE’RE SPACE COPS,” Zaphod shouted.

“Green space cops, and I don’t mean that just because you’re slinging green constructs around, poozers,” a deep, booming voice shouted from behind them. Zaphod and Karia turned around quickly, and saw a large, humanoid alien Green Lantern standing there. He towered over them and dwarfed them in size, wider than the two of them combined. His skin was a pink, fleshy color with hints of orange, and appeared to be not too unlike the flesh of a hog. His arms were folded across his chest, which was extended forward slightly. He was a very intimidating figure.

“Jesus Christ,” Zaphod said.

“Well come on, poozers! Stand at attention!” he barked at them. Zaphod immediately did – finding somehow that he knew exactly the way to stand despite having no idea – but Karia remained with her arms crossed over her chest. “Rookie, I said stand at attention. Why aren’t you standing at attention?”

Karia’s face appeared petrified as if in fear. Zaphod glanced over without moving his face, and saw as she slowly and with great trepidation unfolded her arms, and stood at attention. As her arms fell from her chest, Zaphod could see why she had been covering it.

“A FUCKING BOOB WINDOW? REALLY? THE RING GAVE YOU A UNIFORM WITH A BOOB WINDOW?” Zaphod could not contain himself, and started laughing. Indeed, Karia’s uniform – though apparently resembling Zaphod’s – contained a hole in the center of her chest, partially exposing what lay underneath the uniform. Karia reached up her hand and began to move it to strike Zaphod’s other cheek.

“ATTENTION, ROOKIES. NOW,” the large Lantern ordered. This time, both Zaphod and Karia snapped to attention, Karia’s slap being cut short. “That’s better. I am Lantern Kilowog, the drill instructor for rookie Lanterns. You’re too follow me into the city and report for training. You two will be the new Lanterns of space sector 2814, so you’d better work well together. Let’s go.”

Kilowog flew off in the direction of the metropolis, and Zaphod and Karia just sort of sat there.

“How do we… uh… do we just –“ Zaphod tried to articulate his confusion about how they were expected to fly when Kilowog’s voice boomed back.

“Just will yourself to fly, poozers! Think about it and concentrate on it and just force it to happen! Your rings run on willpower, so you’d better have a ton of it!” The two looked at each other, uncertainly, and after a moment of concentration began to fly. After a moment of rapturous excitement, they flew off after Kilowog.

The city was incredibly packed with Green Lanterns. It appeared that this was their base of operations, and that a number of them lived here full time. Zaphod and Karia looked around as they flew after Kilowog, and were dumbfounded at the sheer number of Green Lanterns. As they flew through more of the city and watched more Lanterns run about, they began to notice a distinct atmosphere of fear and panic in the air. They couldn’t hear individual conversations, but they could frequently pick up the phrase “there was a 1011 last night in the negative sector.” They didn’t know what it means, but people were saying it quite a bit. It appears that whatever that meant, the Lanterns were scared. Which, since they were chosen because they have the ability to overcome great fear, isn’t the most comforting thing.

They reached the barracks with Kilowog, and when they landed saw that he was speaking to another Lantern with four arms and an elongated face. He appeared concerned. Kilowog clapped his hands on one of the other Lanterns’ four shoulders, causing the other Lantern to nod and then fly off. Kilowog turned toward them and kicked a small chest toward them.

“Well, poozers, the Corps has a situation on our hands, so your training is going to be a working one. We’ll be sending you back to your sector to tackle a report we just got in, and you’ll have to learn as you take care of that. Before I send you off, let’s run through the basics.” He reached into the chest and pulled out two large lanterns that resembled the Green Lantern logo on their chests. “These are your Power Batteries. You use them to charge up your rings. Stick your ring in the hole here” - he demonstrated with his own battery – “and speak the Green Lantern oath.

“In brightest day, in blackest night, no evil shall escape my sight. Let those who worship evil’s might beware my power: Green Lantern’s light!” Kilowog’s uniform glowed a brighter green for a moment, and then his ring confirmed the charge.

“Power level 100%.”

“Just like that, nice and easy. As I said, your rings are operated with your own willpower. Just will something to appear, and your ring will create it. We call them constructs,” he said as he demonstrated this as well, creating a construct that appeared to be a large Lantern logo. “You’re limited only by the charge of your ring and your own willpower. You’ll have to figure out your own way of fighting and solving problems on the go, since we’ve got a 1011 on our hands.”

“What’s a 1011?” Karia asked.

“Nothing rookies need to concern themselves with. Now get back to your sector, poozers. There’s a planet there, Earth – we’ve got reports of a new moon that just appeared there, and, well… moons don’t just appear. So go check it out, talk to your rings and use them to report back to us, and then fix whatever needs fixing.”

Zaphod and Karia nodded. They apparently hesitated just a bit too long, because Kilowog created a construct underneath their feet without their noticing, and they were suddenly launched skyward by that construct as Kilowog shouted, “Get out of here, you poozers! You’ve got a job to do!” Instead of falling back to the ground, the two hovered in the air, and then quickly flew off planet back into space.

“Shit, do you know how we’re supposed to use that tunnel thing that got us here? I mean I have no idea where the hell I’m going otherwise,” Zaphod noted. Karia shook her head, equally puzzled. Fortunately, their rings solved the conundrum for them.

“Setting course for 2814.36.C.” The tunnel opened back up, the two felt that sensation of being squeezed through an incredibly small point, and then they were inside, flying freely this time. They took this time to get used to flying, a very novel experience and one they were quite excited to have. The novelty wore off pretty quickly, and Karia started feeling nauseous, so she just sort of floated along from then on out. She glanced down at the absurd boob window that the ring had given her, and shook her head.

“I wish there was some way to change this,” she said. As she said that, however, the uniform glowed green briefly, and the green light covered the exposed area over her chest, and the light faded, revealing a new uniform without the ridiculous lack of clothing over the chest. She looked over at Zaphod, and saw that he too was experimenting with his ring – his ring was creating a monstrously large dildo construct, which appeared to greatly amuse him – as they floated through the tunnel. She decided to try making some constructs. The first thing that her ring successfully created, after a few failed attempts that were just bursts of malformed green light, was a Hylian Shield. Zaphod, seeing Karia’s construct, quickly attempted to create a bow and arrow. While he created the bow with ease, the arrow was a lot less formed, and though it fired from the bow, it struck the Hylian Shield with a disappointing fizzle, having become little more than a small bolt of green light.

“It’s kinda hard to concentrate on two different constructs at once,” he said, as he looked at his bow. He looked back over to Karia, and saw that she was also creating a Master Sword alongside the Hylian Shield, and he narrowed his eyes in annoyance. Before he could create something in response, they were pulled back through the small point, and emerged out the other side of the tunnel, and were back outside Earth’s orbit.

“Neat! I don’t know the physics of that travel system, but it sure is efficient.”

“The Green Lantern folding network folds space at two ends in order to facilitate” –

“NONONONONO DON’T EXPLAIN IT TO ME IT’LL GO RIGHT OVER MY HEAD,” Karia shouted, trying to shut her ring up. It occurred to her then that it was rather strange they could hear each other in space. The ring apparently read her thoughts, as it answered them.

“Your rings convey your messages to other Lanterns as well as other lifeforms in space to compensate for the lack of vibrations.”

“That’s cool,” Zaphod chimed in. “But how could we understand Kilowog? Did you translate his Alien language like the TARDIS or something?”

“Yes, though our technology is sufficiently different from the technology of the Time and Relative Dimensions in Space.”

They decided not to broach that subject, though the idea that the Doctor was walking among the stars was a very appealing one. They had a job to do, and they quickly set about finding the new moon that was supposedly orbiting Earth. It didn’t take long.

“Zaphod, it’s over there,” Karia pointed out. The moon was a bit smaller than the actual Moon, and appeared much more metallic. They approached it, but as they got closer, something became very, very clear.

Zaphod’s eyes widened through his domino mask. “That’s no moon” – his statement was cut short as Karia created a construct over his mouth to prevent his speech.

“Don’t say it. Please god don’t say it.” Zaphod nodded, and Karia released her construct.

“IT’S A SPACE STATION!” he blurted out as he began laughing. Karia clapped her palm to her face. He was right: it was clearly not a moon, but an artificial space station shockingly resembling the Death Star from Star Wars.

“I have always wanted to reenact the finale to A New Hope in space, and now I actually get to!” Zaphod shouted, as he sped off toward the Death Star.

“Is that really a dream of yours? Because it was pretty implausible until about 6 hours ago,” Karia observed.

“Coincidentally, ‘always’, in this case, means for the last 6 hours!”

They approached the surface of the Death Star and found that it was very much operational, with turrets attempting to shoot them down. Karia reconjured her Hylian Shield, and used it to fend off the attacks. She glanced over at Zaphod and saw that he had constructed an entire X-Wing out of green light, and was flying it down the central canyon of sorts. She rolled her eyes but followed him, continuing to block the laser bolts with her Hylian Shield. She conjured a second one to protect both sides, and began to fire green bolts of light at the turrets in an attempt to take them out. When one of them made contact, it exploded in a fantastic display of green fire, and Karia involuntarily cheered in a manner not unlike Han Solo. She saw, however, that an officer had fallen from the tower. She created a third construct – and observed as one of her Hylian Shields became a bit less focused as she did, her willpower being split between three constructs now – to pluck him out of his fall and carry him well above the Death Star, out of reach of turrets. She followed him up there and watched as Zaphod carried on down below.

“Ring, please tell me to use the Force,” Zaphod asked excitedly.

“Bearer, your midichlorian count is not high enough to channel” –


“Very well.” The ring was silent for a moment, and then: “Use the Force, Luke.” It said it almost begrudgingly.

Zaphod’s X-Wing construct flittered a second, and the targeting computer vanished. “Don’t stop now ring, you’ve got more parts to play here.”

The ring would have sighed here if it was capable of doing so. “You’ve switched off your targeting computer. Is something wrong?”

“Nothing,” Zaphod said with palpable glee, “I’m all right.” He closed his eyes, and pretended to fire proton torpedoes into the exhaust vent at the end of the Death Star. What he did not count on was that the ring would actually fire those torpedoes. He opened his eyes, and saw green proton torpedoes racing down the canyon, and then fly right down the exhaust vent. “FUCK,” he shouted as he abandoned the X-Wing construct and flew up as fast as he could, finding Karia hovering far above the Death Star. A few seconds later, the whole thing exploded in spectacular fashion.

“You know, even though a lot of maybe-innocent-but-probably-not people just died, that was so fucking worth it,” Zaphod said, his voice slightly quivering.

“I don’t think they were innocent, Zaphod. This guy here,” Karia said, gesturing to the officer she still had suspended in space by a construct, “was just telling me they were about to fire at Earth. So you just literally saved the world.” Zaphod punched the air a few times before throwing them both up into the air, and gradually floating away. He came back after a moment.

“That’s awesome, but we should probably investigate further.” He turned to the officer. “Who are you working for?”

It was just now that the two realized the officer hadn’t taken a breath in about a minute, because there’s no fucking air in space. The officer managed to choke out a single syllable: “Az…” before succumbing to asphyxiation.

“Oops,” Karia said. Zaphod looked much more grave.

“Did you hear what he was about to say?” Karia was puzzled.


“Motherfuckers. I knew they’d somehow be behind this. But to go all the way and try to destroy EARTH itself? That’s far, even for them.” Zaphod zoomed off before explaining his rambling, flying down toward Earth. Karia followed, still questioning him.

“What was he going to say?”

Zaphod was heading for the Interplosion Mansion. “Who else would be in charge? He was about to say ‘Azog’.” Karia gasped, but felt that Zaphod was probably right – somehow.

“But Azog’s dead! How could it be him?”

“I don’t know, but we’re going to find out.” They had reached the mansion, and flew over to the treeline where Azog and Xicon had been buried. They both constructed a shovel with their rings, and dug up both graves in a single fell swoop.

“Son of a bitch,” Zaphod said.

The graves were empty.


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Post Fri Aug 30, 2013 4:47 pm

Re: INTERPLOSION: The War of Light (4U)

Is this still going?
Captain of the Interplosion Night Watch/Hate Guard. First to be banned.

Glorious victories in LPW thread: 15 and one as Pravado



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Post Sun Oct 06, 2013 9:35 pm

Re: INTERPLOSION: The War of Light (4U)

Interlude Two: Wayward Voyager

A mysterious metallic echoing sound, not unlike air blowing through a steel tunnel, reverberated on the strange planetoid.

A blue light appeared and illuminated bits of the dead surface.

A being, with the appearance of a human, began to walk the surface of the planetoid, kneeling down to investigate certain surface features with his strange tool.

Finding a mysterious bit of soil that didn’t belong, he raised it up to his nose and sniffed.

His eyes widened.

“1011,” he spoke softly, as if whispering to an unseen person next to him.

He quickly stood back up and ran to the place he first appeared on the planetoid.

The blue light vanished, accompanied by the same mysterious metallic echo.

After a moment of emptiness, the being calling himself Agin reappeared with a large grin on his face.

“Message received.”

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